Finding The Line – Roles

So, after completing the Roles chapter, I have had an a-ha moment or two. I’ve learned that what I struggle with most is allowing my ego to control my perspective. I have allowed it my whole life. I’ve been able to breeze through life, getting every advantage and leg up possible, but my ego has continuously told me it’s not good enough, that I deserve more. As a result, I have never fulfilled a role well. I’ve been dropped from teams, fired from jobs and only now am I realizing it was all my own doing.

I genuinely connected with the quote “The Happiness we want to experience in life is denied because of how we feel about our role in it.” This could not be truer for my life experience. My whole life I’ve been a square peg in a round hole. I’ve never felt like I belonged, and I’ve never felt happy. As a kid, I used sports to escape my anxiety and troubles at home. When that coping mechanism took on a life of its own as I grew older, I used alcohol and drugs to further deal with my anxiety and negative perception of the roles that I was in.

Now, as an “accomplished” adult with a family, career, et al, I am realizing that my ego is still running the show. The booze and drugs are gone, but the unhappiness and discontent remain. Purely stemming from my ego and my resentment towards the roles I play in life.

The Roles Chapter was ground-breaking for me because it is allowing me to pigeonhole the source of my unhappiness; my ego.

Finding The Line

So, I guess I’ll start with why I’m taking the Success Strategies Program. Before the pandemic, my career motivation has been dismal at best. I’ve been in the same role at work for five years now. I feel drastically underused and underappreciated. Work is too easy and provides little to no challenge for me. Instead of being grateful for my cushy job, I feel burdened and guilty. I feel like I am not doing enough, I’m not contributing enough, I could be doing more, etc. I’m the former star player who is now on the 4th line just collecting a paycheque.      

The boredom has caused me to lose focus. I sleep in, miss meetings, don’t cold call. I am often distracted by social media, women, Amazon, you name it. I envy the younger guys that I meet out in the trade. They are motivated and hungry. They have that fire I used to have.  

The pandemic has only exacerbated these feelings. I work less and now, thanks to Covid, have a full-blown excuse for it. Instead of admitting to my shortcomings, now I get to chalk it up to Covid.  

I sought out Bob because I want ownership back of my life. I want to feel like I am in control again. Like I am the master of my destiny. I have sat on the successes of yesterday too long and I want that fire back. I want my motivation back to go out and live to the fullest. I am sick and tired of being sick and tired.  

– Trevor, Success Strategies for Men Client